Two New Cracked Articles!

Earlier this week, I was scrolling through my Facebook feed like a good little mindless millennial, when I stumbled across an article that was a list of unsolved murders. Being the sort of person who likes reading about unsolved murders, I clicked on it, and immediately congratulated myself on already knowing all about the first murder on the list. In fact, the further I read, the more familiar the article seemed.

Then I scrolled to the top and realize I'd written the damn thing.

The haunting images of dead-eyed statues, however, were chosen by somebody else.

As it turns out, I submitted an article about creepy unsolved murders back in May, and it got combined with two other excellent articles on creepy unsolved murders, and turned into a two-part creepy murder extravaganza for your Halloween viewing pleasure. Only a handful of the entries are actually mine, but all of them should have you sleeping with the lights on and railing at the unfeeling God that could allow these atrocities to go unpunished. 

You can read Part One right here, and you can read Part Two right here. Or you could go up to the top of the page and find them under the "Cracked Articles" tab. I can't tell you how to live your life.